Journal Entry: Sat Nov 21, 2015, 10:54 AM
It was only a mini hiatus but it was enough to make me clear my head. I've recently not been feeling great due to personal life. My source of escape made matters worse, I temporarily left because I know when I'm in a state over nothing I do stupid things, very stupid things. Rather than embarrass myself or hurt innocent people I just went cold turkey to get my mind to focus.
I had a heart to heart with close friends and they helped reel me back in and give me a shake up. I honestly was willing to just give up on everything art related last night and leave the internet behind me. However, you can thank a friend of mine called Dexter (famous for having beautiful artwork and is a big Tails fan) who reminded me that I love what I do. I'm not the best artist in the world or best story teller but I like what I do and try to put effort into it and he knows that.
I was overwhelmed in recent days, to the point where I couldn't handle it. I don't handle being "well recognised" that well. I don't know if I treat my watchers right or if I will spiral out of control like some infamous people I've seen on here who are ungrateful, arrogant, can't take criticism and can be nasty. I don't want to be that.
It took a couple of people, and I mean a couple, for me to just take a hiatus. I guess when you already feel terrible you feel worse over a couple of insensitive comments. It was about my series but it was the worst insult I could receive. The individual didn't like one of my stories because it was too dark, that's fair enough I can't appeal to everyone. But they went to the extent where they tell me they had an incurable disease and that my fiction was affecting their real life. Do you know how terrible and insensitive a comment that is? That made me feel awful. There's clearly something not right with this person as I never wrote anything to do with a disease in the story I wrote.
I advise any one of my watchers, PLEASE don't broadcast your life story to me. I'm not an agony aunt and am the worst at giving advice for things like that. I am a human being with feelings too and throwing things like that at me is just not called for. If my stories or ideas don't appeal to you, instead of making out like I attacked you in a horrible way, just stop following and move onto something that you feel is more worthy to you. It's really not that hard.
Then there's the whole comic video issue which still hasn't been resolved yet. I actually now want all videos with my comic removed. That really put a downer on me when I found out. I'm honoured people do like my work, but please, don't steal it and put into a video with terrible music. I could easily make a video with my comic with tasteful music and gain views which I think is worthless. Find it on my DA or Tumblr.
I want things to be positive in what I do. This is a fresh start for me to get my head round things and prove that I am a better person and adult. In future I will just discard insensitive messages like the one I had mentioned. I don't need that. I want to limit my time on here where it isn't to the point of an obsession. I felt quite free in the last day and a bit when I went on hiatus. I now and again checked messages but it wasn't as frequent. I also am going to stop making as many journals as I have no desire to create opinions online any more. There's no need for it.
I'm sorry for the needless drama, I need to put a stop to it. Time for a fresh start and to move on positively with things. A lot of things from personal, media and social have been bringing me down. I'm not going into depth but when it all piles on top you know you're a canon ready to explode. Let's just say, Game Grumps was another factor that lifted my spirits, I love those guys.
Thank you for being patient and for the support. I didn't reply to all comments left in my previous journal but know that they meant a lot and I thank you for it.
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